What is a fetish and how do I know if I have one?

A fetish is a sexual attraction to a specific object, body part, or situation that is not typically considered sexual.

 If you find yourself intensely aroused by something outside the realm of typical sexual interest, and this arousal is a recurring and significant part of your sexual experience, you may have a fetish. 

 

The term fetish has become fairly mainstream. However, people's understanding of what constitutes a fetish (and when it becomes a problem) has lagged behind. 

 

a fetish or a kink?

A kink refers to a non-standard or unconventional sexual practice or fantasy. It is a broad term to refer to sexual interests outside of what is often considered "vanilla" sex, where a fetish involves a sexual fixation that a person requires to find sex pleasurable.

 

Fetishes and kinks intersect often - but a kink becomes a fetish when it is viewed as the primary source of sexual pleasure. 

 

A Brief History of Fetish

When fetish first appeared in English in the early 17th century, it referred to objects (often amulets) believed by certain West Africans to have supernatural powers. During the 19th century, the word took on a broader meaning: "an object of irrational devotion or reverence." The object need not be physical: a person may have a fetish for an idea, such as an unwarranted belief that a particular economic system will solve society’s ills. By the early 20th century, fetish took on yet another meaning quite distinct from its antecedents: a sexualized desire for an object (such as a shoe) or for a body part that is not directly related to the reproductive act (such as an earlobe).

 

 

 

People can “fetishize” almost anything

There has not been much research to explore why fetishes develop. However, some theories have been suggested. Biological, cultural, emotional, and social factors may all play a role.

French psychologist Alfred Binet was the first to use the term fetish in an erotic context in 1887. At the time, it was suspected that fetishes took hold through an arousing experience with an object during childhood. Indeed, research has shown that it is possible to condition people to become aroused by objects like boots, suggesting that a fetish is a learned process.

According to a study, the most common fetishes involve body parts, such as feet, or body features, such as piercings, or tattoos. The feet are by far the most common. Body fluid, body size, and hair fetishes aren’t far behind.

After body parts comes things you wear. The same study put clothes worn on the hips and legs, such as stockings and skirts, at the top of the list. Footwear, then underwear, ranked closely behind.

 

When Is a Fetish a Problem?

The truth is that a fetish is only a problem when the fixation interferes with your life or causes undue suffering to you or those around you. 

A sexual or erotic fetish can be defined as an extreme sexual fixation on an object or body part. The object of the fixation is called the fetish, and the person with the fetish is called a fetishist. For a fetish to be considered a disorder, it must cause you significant distress in some manner, and it must have lasted at least six months.

 

Remember to talk about sex before you have it. Be safe & have fun!